Technorati Tags: NLP, Richard Bandler

I have read a few self help books on conversation, NLP and tried a hypnosis CD for confidence, but am far from convinced. I know getting started is the hardest bit. I want to start with general chit-chat but my mind just goes blank. I think I should say Hi, then make a general comment about the environment, perhaps a compliment that’s not too personal. I sort of freeze up and don’t introduce myself and let the moment go by. I don’t drink, it’s been a prevalent problem in my family and I don’t want to follow suit, so I don’t want to hear any of this dutch courage nonsence.

If you have any suggestions or strategies (not examples like use a dating web site though) I would be very grateful. Thanks for reading.

Bob,

We all want something. When you want something, you can be humiliated and teased. Try talking to a woman you want nothing from, someone you do not find particularly attractive and are not after anything from. Just talk about whatever there is on your mind, or whatever you think is on her mind. (within reason of course, it is often necessary to be respectful and contextually correct)

When you have learned that the talking part is easy when you want nothing, you can progress towards expecting nothing. When you expect nothing, you can then talk to anyone the same way as when you want nothing.

It is particularly important of course, not to chase a person around so that you can have a chat about nothing. You have to chat with whoever you come across, but you can be selective and choose not to chat too.

I can’t say that this method has ever worked for me, but then it depends on the objective.

I have heard that it sometimes helps just to say whatever is on your mind, even if it is a bit rude. For example, one woman claimed that a bloke who came up to her in a disco and said "hey, you have a nic pair of tits", was refreshingly honest, and the conversation flowed from there.

Breaking the ice, and the barrier, is all about communicating on the level of the person you are speaking with. Speak their language, and you will win their mind.

I can say that that worked for me, in French at least!

James

If someoen is an expert in this field please provide with guidance where to start.
Please add more than just one or two books, and add them in the order I should read them

Don’t read ANY of them if your intent is to learn "neuro-linguistic programming", it’s completely fake so you’ll be wasting your time. http://www.skepdic.com/neurolin.html

nlp is a latest form of human science which brings change in your thinking nad behavior. since i am a practioner on that i would like to invite you for my training.

what is nlp training?

Powerful NLP technique to help you feel amazing and get what you want… Now.

Duration : 0:9:55

Technorati Tags: Awesomeness, Circle, confidence, influence, Linguistic, Neuro, NLP, of, Programming, strategies, techniques

I have bad problems with motivation, and they’ve really impacted on my quality of life. I’m not depressed, I just have a real problem getting motivated to do the simplest things. In addition to reading books and doing simple strategies, I’ve tried hypnosis, NLP and cognitive therapy. Sadly they don’t work at all for me. Any thoughts on what else I can try? Above all, I feel this is something where I have to change my thought patterns somehow.

Research your personality type. This will tell yuo where your interests lie. It will tell you your strengths and weaknesses so you know what to pursue and what to avoid. Once you know who you are then yuo will want ot be all you can be. It’s very motivational.

Music: A Celtic Dream Track #7 Mountain Dew
David Lyndon Huff

Exercise 2: The Picture Frame

1. Think of a Problem Situation.
Think of another, somewhat troubling experience, or everyday difficulty. The more you use situations and feelings that recur often, the more quickly the NLP will begin to radiate through your life. If your negative feelings from the first exercise haven’t completely diminished or changed as much as you would like, use that situation again here.

2. See Yourself in a Snapshot.
Quickly go through your memory of this incident as if it’s a movie, but this time pick out one moment, like a frame from a film, that best symbolizes the whole experience for you. As you look at that picture, notice if you are seeing yourself, that younger you, at that time, as if you were looking at a snapshot of yourself at the event. If not, simply begin, in your mind’s eye, to pull back so you can see more and more of the scene until you see yourself, a younger you, wearing what you wore at the time. See it all as an observer looking on.

3. Add a Picture Frame.
Holding that image in your mind, consider what kind of picture frame you might want to put around this snapshot. Do you want a square or round frame, or perhaps an oval one? How wide should this frame be, and what color? Perhaps you’d like a modern steel frame, or maybe an old-fashioned gold one with swirled decorations and doves on it. When you’ve picked out a frame, add a museum light.

4. Make It into a Painting or Photograph.
How could you transform that picture into something more artistic? You might even want to see it as an artistic photograph by Ansel Adams, or in the style of a famous painter, as if it were a Renoir or a Van Gogh. Now take your framed moment and place it between other pictures in the private gallery of your mind.

5. Check Results.
Take a moment and clear your mind. . . . Breathe. Now, think of that incident that used to trouble you. Your feelings have probably changed. If not, repeat the exercise using a different frame and a different style of painting or photography until you find the one that changes your feelings in a satisfactory way.

Duration : 0:5:22

Technorati Tags: arts, exercise, health, help, memory, mind, NLP, realization, self, techniques, visual